Pigeons
When people talk about pigeons (which is hardly anytime) they usually say 'Well, it's a bird'. When they see many pigeons, they usually say, 'Yes, there are many birds'. And when they are asked about what it is, they would usually say (usually as in about 0.01%) 'IT'S A F*CKEN BIRD.' And, to be honest, I might have to agree with that statement. A pigeon is a f*cken bird. A F*cken Bird This is absolutely true. There has never been a time where a wiki has been incorrect and told you that a pigeon is a magpie. Coz it's not. It's a f*cken bird, as mentioned many times in this utterly informative article about pigeons. So why do pigeons exist? Well, the best answer available, which is probably the most honest, is that we have no f*cken idea. They are greyish birds (dunno, there might be black pigeons, I don't know, don't wanna be racist here), which like to eat seeds and do whatever the hell they do. Too bad So birds. Don't know em? Well TOO BAD! Nah, just joking Just joking. Birds, are things that fly. Want a more detailed description? Read this, directly taken off the genius, wikipedia.com, English version. Birds (class Aves) are feathered, winged, bipedal, endothermic (warm-blooded), egg-laying, vertebrate animals. Around 10,000 living species makes them the most speciose class of tetrapod vertebrates. That good enough for you? Yeah, good enough Well that's nice to know. Types of Pigeons Default Pigeon The default pigeon is available in any available area that is available. A park, a beach, an anywhere would do. And please excuse my poor English. I'm Australian. Anyway, the default pigeon is grey, and has a lot of grey hair, and has a lot of grey clothing. It has two feet, from my understanding, and usually flies, like a normal bird. That is true, I've seen one do that before. So that's pretty damn amazing. New knowledge. I love that sh*t. The Racist Pigeon You see, some pigeons can be racist. It is common through all types of living species, and even plants can discriminate against one another. A bird, in this case a pigeon, can do this too. How? Using their apparent skill of course, to fly. Nah, just joking, that's not the case. Pigeons can talk in a very nasty way sometimes, and they can often be racist, just like human beings and plants. So, how do other racist pigeons deal with this? Well, they backchat. They tell the other racist pigeon that everything is gonna be okay and that YOU'RE BLACK/WHITE/YELLOW/RED/GREEN/69ER etc. The list goes on, I really would not like to spam my wiki with that sorta sh*t. Wanna spam it out? Comment below. Brasta Pigeon The brasta pigeon is the biggest pigeon out, because of his/her/its fat. It weighs approximately 700kg, and is extremely rare to find. Anyone who has met this pigeon would know that it cannot fly, because of its enormous weight, and is one of the heaviest birds that are alive at this very moment. It is unknown about whether this bird still exists or not, because the last one that has been seen drowned in a very horrible way in 69AD. It tried to dive into the water, but broke the diving board, and fell in the water. It tried to swim its own way out of the water, but its weight didn't do any favours. It tried to reach the edge of the baby pool, but failed, because it was too fat. It tried to doggy paddle, but couldn't because his whole bodymade the baby pool overflow and now there's no water in it to swim, or doggy paddle in. The pool is now in Sydney Technical High School, and is currently covered by a lump of grass, dirt, and a shopping trolley. Cool story, right? It's not a story. It's a fact. That many will disagree with. But it would be unrespectful to the brasta pigeon to leave him out of history, especially if he actually died in a baby pool in the saddest way ever. Many historians, scientists, detectives, and all of them are all trying to figure out how the brasta pigeon drowned to death when there was no water left in the pool (the pool overflowed because of the pigeon's body mass, and volume). The War Veteran (The Dumb Pigeon) It may be a war veteran, but it certainly ain't a genius. The dumb pigeon joined the Australian Army somewhere around the year 1939, when World War II began. This pigeon was an expert with guns, guns, and survival. He could snipe extremely well, but could not chuck stuff very well. Many of these types of pigeons died from friendly fire, unfortunate as it may be. The cause of deaths for 42% of these pigeons are HE Grenades. 21% died from detonating C4 to close to itself. 18% died from chucking a molotov too close to itself. 9.8% were killed by other war veteran pigeons by exploding an explosive barrel close to them. 9% died from getting shot by another Veteran Pigeon with an RPG. The remaining 0.2% died from flying to high and crashing into the sun. Only 17 war veteran pigeons survived World War II, and 9 have died from old age very recently. 5 of the remaining survivors are chilling out, relaxing, having a drink, doing all that crap, and 2 of them are currently playing CoD 69 - Call of Duty: Pigeon Warfare 3. The one final war veteran pigeon is currently missing, and many policemen no one is currently searching for it. Toy Pigeon It's a toy. Not much to talk about. Except for the fact that 30% of these toy pigeons have been eaten by 5 year olds. Very unfortunate, indeed. The Other Pigeon There's always that one pigeon that just can't seem to fit in with the rest of the group. Yeah, the other pigeon. Many More There are many other different types of pigeons, and not all of them can be listed here, as the list is way too long. But ah well.